Change...Life....the Universe and work!

Well I have become transfixed by Modern Flamenco music and it's all Querida's fault and she has no idea! I watched a YOU TUBE video posted by one of my friends and the music that accompanied the video was by an artist called David Pena Dorantes. My first issue is I love it....the second more important one is that in Adelaide I cannot get a CD! iTunes don't have it either and so I have resorted to buying a Flamenco CD...well 2 actually this afternoon and neither of them have his music on them! Why I hear you ask...well because I am in love with the vivacity, life and enthusiasm this music has. I am very affected by music and can be brought to tears by good soulfull music! Some of you may relate to this. Anyway Flamenco music is so apt as I watch Querida move, cavort and generally have her 4pm funnies. I have decided that for my auditions for my Levels I will be using this type of music. If you get a chance look up Orobroy and tell me you don't like it! I bet you will. Oh yeah and I don't bet!
Well Star has changed, as I keep mentioning he is beginning to see that I am ok. He trusts me, wants to show off to me and will follow my ideas when his run out. For a LBE I am so flattered when he says, "Well I am out of cool ideas what have you got to show me?" This is happening more and more but only because I have taken the time to look at his ideas first. Now I have to tell you some of them are spectacular..it's like trying to work out how to harness the energy of the sun! When he is in full LOOK AT ME mode he is an awesome sight. All nearly 16HH of him, tail up, poised, athletic, proud and IN THE MOMENT! Can you imagine working with a horse, tail up, floating and I mean floating...the other night I saw passage and piaffe and these were his ideas....I was speachless....he was offering some of the most difficult dressage movements and executing them with ease....then had a 100 mile an hour bucking fit...asked me questions and then offered a 20 meter circle of lovely cadenced trot! All the while he was looking, asking...checking in. I was and still am drawn to this horse stronger than any magnet is drawn to metal. I know he is feeling the same way about me now.
Querida is learning about food...and at dinner time there is such a thing as respect and she has now to offer it to me. I have had to be very firm with her, I remember watching my lovely Jazz mare working out with Querida how close was close enough to her food thank you. So the other night we had the same discussion...interestingly Querida's first solution to my suggestion she back off was to show me her big butt! Which got tagged. After that it only happened once more and she had it. Then she had more of an attitude of are there any crumbs...so I walked away feiging disinterest in her food. I know I can teach this as Star and Scout now respect me and Bruce at dinner time. Star circles at a distance singing and calling for his dinner and Scout waits! OMG he actually waits! It bothered me the other night as Bruce had to feed them all and he said when he went in with Querida the first thing she did was show her butt. And feign a kick. I was mortified, 1 that Bruce would go in and 2 that she would do this. I am so worried about his safety when I am not there...he doesn't know what to look for, the nuances and veiled threats that horses show especially around food. So while I am away now there are strict guidelines for feeding now in place to keep my darling Bruce safe! How bad would it be if something happened to him while I was away!!! It doesn't bear thinking about!
Well that's it for me. I am away for work thousands of kilometres from home...and off to get some dinner...alone with a book for company.
Savvy on!

Share parelli

Wonder how this will go? I think it's an excellent use of a very popular medium. Wonder what the "normal" world will think. My hope is that it's a success. We are all much happier since Parelli came into our lives!

Wow

Well when you make a break through the key is to make sure that you remain in tune with what helped you make that break through in the first place. Like the prey animal they are non-verbals mean everything. One thing I know is that my relationship with Star is fastly becoming very very special indeed. A guiding hand to lead, a look to gain respect, a signal to say goodbye. The horse of my dreams is coming into view and it's wonderful. I hope that this relationship grows and grows and lasts forever.

Star continues to shine

Well it's been a while since I wrote because we have been so very busy. Work during the week and then so many things to get done on the weekend! However, yesterday after cleaning the house, doing the washing and some gardening I decided to go play with the horses. I decided also to add some more imagination. I backed out the trusty Bronco and hooked up the float took it down to the arena and made a toy out of it. I then went and got Star and decided we would play with the float. See it's not about the float! Is it!

We played and got lots done, I had watched the recent Savvy Club DVD again that goes through Horsenalities and so I played more provocatively and it worked. Star being innately a LBE made huge progress. We got more sideways then ever. I asked less and got more, I think before in sideways I have been too "light" in my suggestions. When I wasn't I got more and from further. I noticed that the initial ask needed to be straight to the point and it was almost as if he said, "Oh you mean this?"

After playing all around the float he actually offered to go in and then when I asked him not to this blew him away! Ah hah! Then as he was so calm, inquisitive and obedient I got on bareback and bridless and practiced some patterns. He actually got follow the rail after about 2 minutes. Then we played in the corners and did backups and he really seemed to like it. He even blew and sighed. I was so proud of him. I even trotted him, when using the fluidity techniques I actually was able to sit his trot, which is big, and he lengthened markedly at both the trot and the walk!

Meanwhile in the bottom paddock Scout was having a complete meltdown. He could see us fine so it was more like jealousy. When I hopped on Scout went beserk and tore around the paddock at break neck speed, solving my thoughts of how I was going to get him fit! He really seemed openly annoyed/upset that I was riding Star. When I went back to the paddock I ended up playing with Scout for 10 minutes. It was all he wanted and seemed calmer afterwards. He is such a mixed up boy! But he is a darn sight better than this time last year!

I was so happy and am so happy with how Star is going and how much he is changing.

I am completely convinced that with PNH most horses who have been challenging...in the right hands can become partners. I am certainly finding that anyway!

Last Saturday the world became a better place for us

Last Saturday I took my saddle to the arena with no thoughts to riding but it was there if everything went ok. I played with Scout first who, bucked, reared and generally decided that if I was going to be a leader I had to step up to the plate. Well i did and hence the rearing came back. Once we got that out of the way, rearing meant he had to get busy, he hates that. Then he calmed and we played patterns, touch it and chilled. Mini-weets are his new treat and he loves them! After an hour I thought, lets play with the saddle on. We did, nothing happened. Then I thought...well I will get on. So I asked for permission and got on. Woo hoo it was great and I did everything with no reins and only my stick! We did patterns, he looked for mini-weets and thanks to Bruce he found them. He really felt like a partner! We did lots of interesting things for him, at his pace and then he offered a canter! Amazing for a horse that likes to conserve energy and if it wasn't for his farting could almost be classified as carbon neutral!! I ended the day on a high with him, he got a little treat, lucerne chaff and minerals and a squirt from the hose.

Star waited patiently at the gate. He was so relaxed it was astounding. So I decided to ask permission and saddle him up. He said ok, stood still as a statue for this. I kicked myself as I had left my shims up at the stables and Star has a back with shape unlike Scout, so he needs some shims. Oh well, I saddled up, saddle sat ok but not perfect. We played a bit and then I got on. Star didn't like the idea of me getting on from the pedestal so I had to get on from the ground. Keeps me limber at least getting onto a 16hh horse! Once on board we did bending which he expected I think, we play this on the ground so he knows what I am asking. Then we set of at the walk! It was huge, his walk compared to Scout's is a huge 4 beat walk. :-) Gorgeous. He sighed as we did figure of 8 then out to follow the rail and then clover leaf. I kept him thinking and walking and with the lightest ask (I just thought it) we trotted. A calm relaxed balanced trot. Had it not been for me bracing it would have been perfect. Why can't I be like I used to be? Fluid with the horse, not a brace in sight? I don't ride Star with the stick yet, he's still needing more confidence with it but he is also a very differnt horse to Scout. He acted like a partner right from the start...where Scout has to be reminded. I think this stems from Scout being hand raised which has made him cocky and self assured as well as very LB!!!

I would have gone out and checked the fences had I had my saddle set up properly but decided to call it a day on a good note. Star was pleased I think. He yawned at least 6 times and for us both it was very emotional. Me because I have helped him come this far and for him I think he's finally realising that being with me isn't bad at all!

I was so happy I cried! Bruce got it in one. He said, "Well you have both been through so much together from the beginning to now you have both changed so much. Look at you both now, 12 months ago you wouldn't have dared to dream you would be here". He is very right. I dared to dream, stayed focused on my goal and it's all coming to gether.

I hope one day to go to a Savvy Spotlight with my two special boys and play with them together. Dreams they grow like seeds when given the attention of your imagination and the care of focus!

Thinking and assessing - what are my dreams?

My dream is to one day ride a dressage test on my partner Star. I will enter the arena with saddle and bridle and then at the halt and salute I will salute the judge, ask Star to bend to me. I will remove the bridle and continue on with the test bridleless. This is my dream, I will stay true to it and one day together we will achieve it. It's my selfish dream but I can see us achieving it.

Quality vs Quantity of Life

What to do. Next door to me is a 16hh TB gelding who is so very thin. He has a lovely LBI nature and apparently he is sick. Well that's what I am told. I am also told that he is very old. I don't believe that for one minute. I have looked at his teeth and put him between 10 and 15. He is so thin, about 2-3 on weight scale. He looks to be worm infested, lacking in minerals and is miserable. I am trying to get in touch with his owner to find out what she is going to do with him. He has two other companions who although neglected are doing ok. I really want to go into this paddock, get him and bring him home to our place. That I can't do as I could be charged with theft!

Why do people have horses who aren't prepared to care for them? It makes me so angry!

_____________________________________________________________________

I have since spoken to his owner. She tells me the horse is her sisters. He is elderly and has a disease which affects his ability to metabolise food. It's some sort of wasting disease. She doesn't see him much and wasn't really concerned when I told her that on the very hot days this horse was obviously suffering. I talked to her about quality vs quantity of life. Some people just don't get it. I feel for this horse.

Honesty

I have to say this.  

I have to be honest with myself.  I have to be honest with my horses and most of all I have to be honest in my actions. 

There is no point riding when my heart is not in it.  There is no point in making myself do something that should be joyful or it will turn into a chore.

I have 2 horses that 12 months ago where dangerous, unrideable and bound for bad places.  I took them on to heal me as much as to heal them.  I took them on because I knew that these horses that others told me were only fit for the doggers would cause me to look for another way.  They have and I have found it.

I also along the way have learnt to have confidence in myself, my own depth of knowledge and really LISTEN to people.  There are comments like, you are so sensible, you know a lot about dressage, how do you make your horse do that?  You are a true horse lover.  All these comments I am now HEARING because I am listening again to others. Not my own inner voice of self doubt that quickly undermines my self esteem, my confidence and my outlook.

I am facing up to my demons now because I have confidence, stability and faith in myself and my demons are shrinking!

I look forward to the day when I ride Star and feel safe and he feels like he has a leader.  I look forward to the day when Scout is at a stage where Bruce, a total beginner, can ride him and I know he will be as safe as houses for him to learn.  I look forward to the day when we can load the horses in the float and go to the forest...ride along the beach and enjoy our partnership.

I have grown wary as I have grown older and as I approach my 40th birthday I am stripping away all the things that hold me back.

My 30's were conservative, my 40's are going to be one hell of a ride!

Still hot!

Not much has happened with the horses.  The garden on the other hand now has 300 metres of drip irrigation tubing installed.  With only one minor error corrected it all works fine!  I ache all over and have spent about 12 hours in the evenings and during the day yesterday getting it all in but now I feel better that at least my plants and subsequent plantings are going to be watered and watered wisely.  We bought 9,000 litres of water that was delivered yesterday and so our house water tank looks a bit healthier!  With no end in sight to the heat at this stage I think its going to be a quiet week  :-)

So hot...45 degrees in the shade!

Well if little Pokey here had been outside today he would have been a melted mess! It got to 45 degrees at home in the shade!! I have written to a friend of mine in Canada and asked for him to send some snow!

I spent time with the horses this evening..it was still over 35 degrees at 2030. The only thing to do was congregate at the water trough...play friendly game with water. Scout wasn't interested but Star let me saturate him with water, he then walked off to his rolling hole and covered himself in dirt. A grey turned brown in front of me. Perfect sunscreen. Querida seeing Star rolling decided she would go for the environmental dry grass roll and ended up looking much like Worzel Gummage! Covered in straw she still looks resplendant!

The garden has somewhat survived..some plants are looking sad but they will get a reprieve overnight and a drink in the morning. I have had to order some more water so we don't run out over the next couple of months. We will be set next summer when our big 20,000 gallon tank is full. For now we have to be careful. I wonder how hard it will be to plumb the toilets into bore water? We shall see.

While the weather is hot it's the perfect time to get all our accounts done and the paperwork for the business..not that I like doing it but at least I am not feeling like I am doing nothing!

Water trough or paddling pool?

Tonight on my regular check of the horses I caught sight of something amusing. Two geldings playing splashing games in a 200 litre water trough. They were both soaked from head to chest! When they saw me they stopped playing and came over, the aroma of wet horse was very pungent! Tonight I gave out scratches and managed to find an itchy spot on Scout at the base of his withers. He rarely lets me scratch him but tonight he obviously felt he had to let me get this spot. Star as usual allowed me to move my hands over him and guided me to his spots, as usual head, withers and rump. Querida just had an itchy head, but playfully asked me if I had any itchy spots I needed itching. We played porcupine game...she leans into pressure..funny girl. Looking out into the distance this evening she easily measures over 15hh so she is going to be big! A wonderful evening, no glaring sun, plenty of appreciative horses and not a care in the world. If only I didn't have to go to work tomorrow life would be almost perfect!

From Danny to Scout in less than 12 months I have an amazing partner

Scout who used to be called Danny. I first saw him at a PNH Clinic where he was terrorising his 13 year old human. I saw him and thought...what a challenge. Strangely I also thought that he needed help. He needed safety, leadership and love. The more I have found out about him the more I know this is true. This is us last summer....many things have changed and we are becoming partners...equals and mates!

Star Assault - from prey animal to partner

This is the photo that accompanied the advert that drew me to him. His racing name was Star Assault and by all accounts he did assualt several unsupecting stable hands! He knows he's big, he loves to play and he was an "in your face" type of horse. This shot was very interesting as it told me a lot with no words at all.

Star Assault - Now changing to Super Star!

His racing name was Star Assault, he was bred from a very proud sire, Starraq and his father was At Talaq. Both his father and grandfather were described as temperamental hot headed horses..I wonder if they really were.

This is the photo I bought him from. His attitude was what drew me to him. He was confident, good looking and athletic. He loves to play and that was very daunting at first. Now I know how to channel that play drive and he literally stops traffic when we play at liberty. He excels at the difficult, finds the everyday stuff mundane. He's a LBE with a very good sense of humour.

Weather heating up.....horses are chilling out

Well the weather is set to bake the land for the next week. 4 days over 40 degrees is seeing us become nocturnal and the horses seek shade!
Last night I puddled around with the horses, they like being with me now. So wonderful.
Star is becoming very calm and quiet, almost ridable! This time last year he was running into trees in a right brain kinda way. He couldn't cope and would run and run until he got puffed out, or distracted! Now I know what to do when this horse turns up and he spends less time on adrenaline!
Scout is turning more and more LBI and it's taking all my savvy to get him interested in things. He looks at me asking what's in it for me more often than not now :-) I watch certain DVD's over and over again looking for extra help in tempting him to play and enjoy it.
Querida is learning avidly. Something tells me that she is going to be very special indeed.

My year will be filled with many challenges I am sure. Mostly me overcoming my long held fears. I want to ride but my horses can be challenging and so I don't. I really want to work on my position, relaxation and fluidity. I know it will change, I am taking the time it takes and while doing this I am becoming more and more confident with my horses.
Sooner or later I am sure we will all feel the same. Confident, safe and in tune.
Until next time.

Our Horses are our mirror

Well I had a BFO today.  I watched a little bit of Parelli Tellie while I ate my lunch.  This stuck in my head.  "Our horses are our mirror, as we become happier so do they.  They feel our mood and refelct where we are at."  Well I think that this is bang on the money.

My horses have become happier and I have become happier as I feel more fulfilled in my life.  No longer do I feel trapped by work and pressure that I can't control.  I am learning how to deal with stress, live in the moment and I am finally giving myself permission.  For so long I have had trouble doing this.  I can see that decisions I made regarding work, although difficult, were the best decisions I ever made.  I can see that my future is mine to shape and mould and so armed with this knowledge I am changing the way I live, look at life and react to what's happening to me.

Last night I spent 15 minutes of undemanding time with my horses.  Querida got scratches fixing all her itches to the point where my fingers were aching!  She is still sore and is symptomatic at the moment but she seems happy enough. I have to get some weight off her but even in a paddock with not much feed and her not getting anything additional other than the odd carrot she is still rotund!  She is also changing and starting her journey towards being rose grey :-(  I love her as a black bay.

Star and Scout each got itches scratched and ear massages.  I feel a very calm wave come over me when I am with Star.  He is the one I am most in tune with.  I think he is in tune with me, he sulks if I play with Scout and not him.  When I spend time only with him he gives this feeling of being very satisfied, happy and at peace.  This horse has come such a long way it's amazing that it's all happened in only 16 months or so.  I am so proud of him.

Scout is forever trying to test my leadership every morning and every night.  I still have a way to go in our partnership but so does he.  He needs to act like a partner more and I am slowly seeing this happening.  Last Sunday he stood on a stump for me after trying listlessly for 20 minutes to see if I would give up.  When he did eventually get on the stump I praised him and left him be watching him and marvelling at what he is capable of when he "wants" to try.  Someone said to me "there is nothing better than having a big solid horse to ride when you are out" I know one day that will be the case and it won't be too long away.  I want him to be that big solid horse who is safe and dependable that Bruce can ride and I will know he will be ok.

My garden is going well.  We are pumping from the bore and our water worries are somewhat gone now.  Bruce has set up a fire system run off the fire pump so we can wet the house paddock should we get a grass fire.  I can water the lawn and get it growing to reduce the dust!  Our new tank is a 1/4 full which is great and there is rain forecast for the weekend!

Oh well, back to work but I have a busy few weeks ahead and playing with the horses keeps it all in perspective.

Until next time.

2009 A New Year and more surprises

Wow, time has flown, I have not had time to write my blog but my horses are all loving life!

November 2008, we lost our herd matriach Jazz to colic.  She waited for me and told me in no uncertain terms that she was unwell as soon as she saw me.  I had come back from Equitana in Melbourne eager to get out and see them.  She was waiting under her tree, she didn't come up to me like she usually did, my intuition told me all was not well here.  She tried to come up, then turned and looked at her belly and then dropped on the ground groaning.  I ran to her, checked her and then ran inside and frantically put calls into the vet and a lovely friend of mine.  The vet for medical help for Jazz and my friend for moral support for me.  2 hours later Jazz was taken by the angels and died in my arms.  There was nothing I could do to save her.  I felt so helpless.  We buried her in her favourite resting spot with that area being fenced off forever now.  We are going to plant some maples so every autumn I will see their chestnut leaves and remember her.  Its been nearly 3 months and I still get emotional when I think about her.

The boys are becoming partners!  People who told me to get rid of them, send them to the Pal Factory are now wanting to know what I have done to change them.  My neighbours are stopping to quietly watch me as I play at liberty with Star, who offers to show me how much he values me by playing off-line like he was on-line.  There is no bigger compliment than this as far as I am concerned!

Scout and I attended a camp in Victoria with Chris Corbidge, a Parelli Natural Horsemanship instructor, and we made the biggest in-roads into building our relationship to date.  We now have an understanding and he's letting me be the leader and having faith that I am a worthy one!

We have had a new arrival in between all this.  Querida, a 2 yo Pura Raza Espanola.  She is my project, my blank canvas and my little special girl!  Well not so little as she's 15hh at 2 and won't really mature till 4 or 5 so i think she's going to get to 15.3hh possibly?  Who knows.

I am avidly learning as much as I can, reading, watching and surfing and I am collecting more savvy arrows as I go.

I hope to come back more often to fill in what's going on.  Things are changing so rapidly it would be a shame not to have something to look back on and relish our achievements!

So 2009 holds for us.  More of the same, a wonderful journey with three very special horses and carrying the memory of Jazz always very close.